Sara and I went on a date to a restaurant last week, the food was good, but they had the unfortunate habit of using...

Sara and I went on a date to a restaurant last week, the food was good, but they had the unfortunate habit of using "real" as an adjective in their menu, as in "real chicken" or "a salad with real eggs" (it actually said that). Using "real" as a descriptor in a menu falls under the category of things that while good that they are true, are actually more disconcerting to mention than positive. Examples of words that fit this category are "edible", "palatable", and "non-toxic".

If I'm in your restaurant and I'm reading the menu, I'm just going to give you the benefit of the doubt that the ingredients you list are actually going to be provided (especially if your entrees are $25 and up). If you mention that the egg in your salad is "real", now I need to challenge my basic assumptions. The egg is real, but they didn't say anything about the tomatoes... or, what were they thinking of providing instead?

While I'm ranting, the other restaurant peeve that they triggered, was listing olives as part of their salad and then only providing two. At two olives you are not exceeding anyone's expectations, there's no room for you to go any lower, and you're dangerously close to not qualifying for the "s" at the end of "olives". Seriously though, at two olives it's not part of the salad, it's a garnish You don't need to mention it, surprise me. It's like noting that it comes with a sprig of parsley. Also, as a basic rule of aesthetics, things look better in odd numbers. Is that extra olive going to break your profitability margins? Live a little, throw in some extra olives.